laziness has lead to a severely curly hair day.

i notice a lot of the time that i don't actually seem to have a lot in common with most of my friends. there are a lot of suggestions that people make and when i think about doing them, all i can do is think about how much i would rather do anything else. for an example, please refer to the post about the world's most boring dinner. that took an activity i quite enjoy (dinner out with friends) and turned it awful. or text messaging, another activity i like which is frequently taken over by people texting me about how annoying their coworker is, random nonsense that i can't understand and vague ideas to try to get me to ask a question that when i do, i don't get a real answer because you "don't want to talk about it." i think a big part of this is because i fail a lot at being entertained by what seems to be considered regular activity. or maybe we just don't seem to have the same idea for what is fun. my friend n told me recently that she is "over going out every saturday night, drinking, partying, whatever and waking up hung over on sunday." i told her that was a hilarious thought because she spends maybe 5 saturdays like that a year, even in the hay day of college. she's never been a party-er but she felt the need to bring to my attention that she is over it. i wasn't entirely sure if it i was a dig against me or not. i've always been the go out saturday night and have a good time with my friends, sleep in on sunday type (though i've never been hung over) and i don't feel like i need to change that. i'll stop doing that when i'm ready to stop doing that. but as i have said before, she is obsessed with "doing what you are supposed to do" and thus at 27, she clearly shouldn't be living it up on saturday nights. thank god, it gives her more time to sit in boredom with her fascinating boyfriend. don't get me wrong, it is lovely to spend time in local downtown areas, in coffee shops or local breweries, but every weekend? this is for sure one of those times when i realize my lack of common interest with my friends.

i found out this morning that my cousin got engaged yesterday. that was a pleasant surprise to find on facebook upon arriving for yet another day of monotony work. she lives in hawaii, where right now, they are 6 hours behind us. it seems that i should have been more upset that i found this news out on facebook. this is my only cousin that is my age but she and i aren't particularly close. in fact, we have only met once in our adult life and that was last year. we have a lot in common and we get along just fine it's just we aren't that close which for some reason is a difficult concept for me to adequately express. i made the mistake of telling n that my cousin was engaged. she sent me a text message back with way too many exclamation points, which for the record is more than two ever. and while that is exciting and everything, this was too much. she said she was so excited because "they are in love and want to spend a lifetime together. it's a very happy thing." i instantly thought, hmm..is it a happy thing? i suppose it is but quite frankly, i'm ambivalent to the whole deal. maybe if it was someone who was closer to me or something. i don't know. i understand that it is a happy occasion for them but it doesn't have any bearing on my life so...i guess i just don't feel the need to appropriate emotions to it. also it seems important for me to point out that i am a cynical person. like deeply, very cynical. to me, marriage doesn't mean forever anymore. it seems to mean, as long as things are good.

more importantly i think that the beatles are wrong. you need more than love to make a relationship work forever. i'll be the first to tell you that i have no idea how to make a relationship work forever. but i managed to make one work for almost five years so that's something right? i know that love is important but that alone is not enough to keep a relationship together. if that's all you have, i think that what gets you to a point, 10 years down the road when you wake up with one kid, another one on the way and think "i'm going to have to smother my significant other with a pillow before he wakes up." so the whole business of getting excited about people getting married because they love each other...yawn. i can't be bothered to think about that as if it counts for something forever.

this lead me to the realization that n and i exist on exact opposite ends of a spectrum. she is a hopeless romantic and i am a dark cynic. life might be better if we could meet somewhere closer to the middle then her text messages would probably get on my nerves less.

from the girl who can't get enough of the show happy endings.

until next time...